in other news..

I had my first trimester screen and ultrasound yesterday. It was so much easier going to this appointment since I had already confirmed the heartbeat the night before! As expected though, my doctor teased me about having it. He said "if the baby comes out shivering and shaking, we'll know why." I cant believe he said that! My husband said "he was just kidding!" (ugh, men!), but still... saying that to me of all people, he should know I would worry. So I said "is it really a risk?" and he said there's no proof whether it's a risk or not... but it has lower sound waves than an ultrasound, so the risk is low. Hm. What's "low?" The risk for stillbirth of a healthy term baby is "low" too, by some standards. Crap. I guess I'll be limiting the use to every other day instead of every day. He said he understood how hard it is, especially before you can feel movement, but he said the risk of maternal stress isn't good either.

Bottom line - nothing is easy in pregnany after loss. TWO types of losses. Will I feel safe in trimester 2 because I've never had a loss during that time? Doubtful.

It's a good report though... heartbeat 160s, all bloodwork looks good, I lost a pound (gained a bunch at first because I was so hungry! leveling off now..) my blood pressure is stellar at 118/68. I've never had such good BP as I do in pregnancy! We had a good talk about some plans for later in the pregnancy such as when to deliver, seeing the MFMs, when NSTs will start, what we'll do if there's a questionable one, whether I'll need an amnio/steriods depending on how far I go... I felt really good about the appointment. One of my two favorites is leaving for Iraq very soon, and this one I saw (the one who's not leaving) said he's ok if I just see him while the other is gone (there are 8 in the practice.) I feel most comfortable with those two.. and they will do the c-section. He's the one who delivered Kathlyn, and the other one did Cherry baby's "delivery", so I know they are honored and excited about delivering tweetie bird for me :)

I think it's a girl... some people I know sometimes see the beginnings of a boy at these 11-12 weeks appointments... but nothing here. We'll see.. doesn't matter to me. Next appointment: September 1.